Friday, January 28, 2011
One week home
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Brown Evelope
So here is the story we had been told by our coordinator and then again by the person who swore us in that the consulate. A few days before we arrived, a family just received their brown envelope and left the building, they went to a park to allow their children to play for a while. they went back to their hotel and were getting the kids ready for bed, giving them baths when the mom discovered she couldn't find the envelope or passport. they went back to the park, but couldn't find it. they went to their coordinator who went to the consulate, and the answer to the family was that they were going to have to stay in China for 3 months while the new paperwork and passport was being completed.
I'm a little fuzzy on the next details, but as i understand it, an old woman found the child's passport, and had returned the passports for a finders fee, and they asked her if she has seen the brown envelope too? She had, it was in the trash, opened, and for an additional fee she was able to find and return the brown envelope. The family only had to stay an additional few weeks instead of 3 months.
the moral of the story that was pounded into our heads was, do not let this envelope out of your sight! We gave our brown envelope to the officer and it was processed, the girls became citizens of the US in the Newark Airport.
stay tuned...we will have some more pictures of our trip in the next day or so. we are getting all the pictures from the camera ready.
Monday, January 24, 2011
letter to family and friends
Dear Family and Friends,
We deeply appreciate all the support and excitement that you have shown us during this journey. We are overjoyed at God's grace, but we also realize this will be a season of adjustment for our family.
We are confident of this: God’s design is PERFECT! His plan for parents and children is a beautiful and meaningful picture of His love for us. Attachment between a parent and child occurs over time when a baby has a physical or emotional need and communicates that need. The primary caretaker (usually mommy) meets the need and soothes the child. This repeats between a parent and child over and over to create trust within the child for that parent. By God’s very design, an emotional foundation is laid in the tiniest of babies, which will affect their learning, conscience, growth and future relationships. The security provided by parents will, ultimately, give children a trust for and empathy towards others.
Children who come home through adoption have experienced interruptions in this typical attachment process. The loss of a biological mother and father at an early age can be a major trauma on their little hearts. Paige and Phoebe will soon experience the loss of familiar and comforting caretakers as well as the sights, smells, and language of their birth country. They will be overwhelmed. Everything around them will be new and they will need to learn not just about their new environment, but also about love and family. They have not experienced God’s design for a family in an orphanage setting. They will struggle with feeling safe and secure and may lack the ability to trust that we will meet their needs. The good news is that we can now, as their parents and forever family, rebuild attachment and help her heal from these emotional wounds.
The best way for us to form a parent/child bond is to be the ones to hold, snuggle, instruct, soothe and feed them. As this repeats between us, they will be able to learn that parents are safe to trust and to love deeply. We are, essentially, recreating the newborn/parent connection. We will be doing what we believe is best to help them heal from those interruptions in attachment as effectively as possible.
Why are we telling you all of this? Because you will actually play an awesome and vital role in helping them settle in, heal, and lay a foundation for the future. There are a few areas in which you can help us:
The first is to set physical boundaries. It will help us immensely if adults limit what is typically considered normal, physical contact with Paige and Phoebe. This will (for a while) include things like holding, excessive hugging and kissing. Children from orphanage settings are prone to attach too easily to anyone and everyone – which hinders the important, primary relationship with parents. Waving, blowing kisses or high fives are perfectly appropriate and welcomed!
Another area is redirecting their desire to have their physical and emotional needs met by anyone (including strangers) to having us meet them. Orphans often have so many caretakers that they, as a survival mechanism, become overly charming toward all adults. A child struggling to learn to attach may exhibit indiscriminate affection with people outside of their family unit. It may appear harmless and as if they are “very friendly” but this is actually quite dangerous for the child. Please understand that we want nothing more than to have Paige and Phoebe hugged, cuddled and cherished by ALL of you. But until they have a firm understanding of family and primary attachments, we would be so grateful if you direct them to us if you see that they are seeking out food, affection or comfort.
Also, please feel free to ask us any questions at any time. We are learning, too, and are grateful that you are speaking with us to help Paige and Phoebe feel loved, safe, and secure. Thank you so much for your love and support over the last few years.
With Love
P and K
Sunday, January 23, 2011
we made it home
we are doing well and we arrived home on friday evening. it was a long, long day. we started out leaving our Garden Hotel at 2pm, all the others in our group were there to see us off, that made it so special to us. we took a van to the consulate where our guide picked up our documents. a one minute drive later and we were at the train station. Even that is a huge building, thankfully our guide, Simon, took us to the right spot and then he was off to the next family. We had to pay a pretty penny to get our bags checked onto the train, 70rmb or about $11 each bag, which is steep for 5 bags. The usual thing to do is to take all your luggage on board with you.
the train ride was about 2 hours and it was really nice to see the "country side" along the way. it was very rural and you could see little patches with gardens and then some larger cities along the way too. nate was very excited to ride the train and he knew this was the last part of our trip and that made him happy too.
we arrived in hong kong about 6pm, we had to pay another porter to take our bags to the street. we had to rent a van with a driver to take us the our hotel. we arrived around 8pm. We spent about 12 hours in the hotel and then we were off to the airport. the morning light brought some beautiful sites, hong kong is beautiful! there were huge mountains and enormous buildings. we were close to a lake or ocean and on the way to the airport we could see the gondolas going across the highway and up the mountains.
the lord was watching over us on this trip. he blessed us with some amazing people who took great care of us. as we checked in the computers were down. when they finally started working we had waited about 1 hour and had just 1 hour to get checked in and make it to our plane. there were some complications and it took them 50 minutes to check us in! one of the women walked us the entire way to the plane, she took us through staff security entrance, and probably 1 mile of walking, 4 elevators and a train ride to our gate. we were pretty much last to board and they held the plane for us and our luggage. when we started to board they wanted to check our luggage, my lifeline to our babies EVERYTHING. i had a small backpack for a few diapers and a bottle but all our supplies were in the carry on. i had to fight pretty hard to get that bag on the plane but they finally found room.
we were on the plane with a "celebrity" stewardess, here is a link to her,
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2010/12/28/eveningnews/main7192655.shtml
i asked her if she was on TV and she didn't really answer me, but i knew it was her as soon as i saw her and P recognized her too.
We arrived in Newark and had to go through customs and immigration, it took about 1 hour. Our girls became citizens at this point, it seemed a little uneventful and we couldn't even take picture. we had to pick up our luggage and drop it off in another place. Once again, it was up elevators, down a few escalators, walking and running through the airport, and standing in line for 30 minutes for security. we just made it to the gate and they said we had 90 seconds to get on the plane or it was leaving. it made for a quick goodbye to grandma. this time they did take our carry on luggage, we opened it up on the plane and took diapers and formula for the two hour flight and we were done.
i had a few problems on this flight, the last flight during landing, it triggered my vertigo and i was sick most of the time in the airport and getting on this last flight. P did an amazing job taking care of the kids, he is my super hero! the lord was good to us, things could have been so much more difficult but He provided abundantly.
We arrived home around 8pm and it was a wonderful site. nate was so happy to get home, he dumped every single toy out on the floor and practically laid down in his toys. he was happy. the girls have had an easy transition, they have had no problems with their crib or the play yard, or the highchairs. we are still working on attachment with them and have a long way to go.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Leaving on a jet plane
I leave you with some photos from the last few days. Not sure if I will get to post again before we get on the plane so we ask for a few prayers.
We have safe travel, no delays, and peace as we travel.
That all the kids stay healthy, in good spirits and no breakdowns. We will be on the plane for 13 hours straight.
We don't hit bad weather coming into Newark on Friday.
We leave on Friday at 2pm and arrive on Friday at 6pm, the longest day of our lives! Pray we can get some sleep on the plane, have lots of patience, and have no delays.
When we get home we can all deal with jet lag and recover quickly.
As soon as we land on US soil, the girls become US citizens! Praise the lord!
Thank you for your comments and and for your prayers, they mean so much.
See you in a few days!
Monday, January 17, 2011
Subway, Asian olympics, mall
We brought our new stroller with us and I have to say we have put on some serious mileage and it has seen some rough days. This city is not easy for the handicap or strollers, sidewalks are high and have few lowered crosswalks. We have had to help each other in our group carry strollers with kids in them up/down huge flights of stairs, across very bumpy stone walkways, over high door steps and over stop posts that allow only pedestrian walking. We encountered many stairs on our adventures in the subway today.
We also went to a huge grocery store today. I can't believe how many employees there are at grocery stores. Each aisle has a "salesperson" to help you and to promote their store brand. There are also people selling specific brands in each aisle like Lipton in the drink aisle, she was dressed in a yellow outfit that reminded me of a 1970's plane stewardess. The stores are so busy with people that they have smaller shopping baskets, a cart that you can add the small baskets.
We have to buy lots of water, the tap water in undrinkable by everyone, it can only be used if boiled. Hotel restaurants are very expensive so we are trying to buy some meals at the store to make in our room. This city is so much nicer to walk around in that we have enjoyed many nice meals out too.
Three more days and we leave for the last leg of our journey, we have one night in hong kong. We are trying to absorb as much as we can of this wonderful country. We are having a wonderful time here. They are keeping us very busy but I know when we leave we will have wished we had done more.
Drawing a crowd
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Busy day2
This text didn't come up with the pictures, let's try this again.
> We had an amazingly busy day. By 9:30 we were in the lobby to go to our visa picture appointment. We got the girls pictures taken and then we were off to the medical clinic to have the girls looked at. We visited the ENT area, the weight and height area and the general dr that looked at them for 2 minutes. It probably took us 45 min to complete. Lots of standing in line.
> Did a little shopping on shamian island and we got back to the hotel and had to do 2 hours of paperwork as a group.
> We had dinner with another family traveling with us at Lie gardens Cantonese restaurant. Yummy!
> Our hotel is beautiful and I can't say enough at how happy we are at staying here. I an going to explore the hotel tomorrow, haven't been able to see much, what I can tell you is we eat breakfast by a 40 ft waterfall and a beautiful garden. Amazing.
> Pics: There is a picture of P standing in the lobby in front of an enormous gold and black relief painting. Nate is with his new friend Jacob, another boy traveling in our group. The girls in their new snow suits in Nanchang.
> Off to another day of sightseeing, temps are so much nicer here too, probably in 50s with a cool breeze.
> Love to all
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Teng Wang Ge Pavilion
Leaving Nanchang
-They are building a new airport right next to the old one, it's going to be huge.
-When we arrived it was hazy and we discovered it was because of all the construction in the area was allowing the dirt and dust to blow around, it was a hazy red.
-This city is huge, it seems to go on forever. it has 4 million people in it, that is considered small!
-The hotel is beautiful, however the beds are incredibly hard, like nothing I knew could exist. It's like they took a sheet and put it on the dinning room table and called it a bed. Every hour we wake to turn because we are so sore.
-Right now they are on a no honking restriction, if they are caught they can get a ticket. I can only imagine the sound when it picks up.
-Because of the Chinese new year, or they call it spring festival there are firecracker going off many times during the day, sometimes they last 3-5 minutes and go day and night.
-We seem to be a big spectical here, everywhere we walk crowds of people gather to see the babies, they touch their cheeks and hold up two fingers, as if to ask twins. Then they give us thumbs up. This includes adult men, children and all women.
-there is a lot of construction going on in the city, two huge hotels are going up across the street.
-the girls are eating congee, rice and formula, they are in size 3 diapers and 6-9 month clothes.
-the girls are able to sit on their own for a bit longer now and are grabbing for toys. When they are close to each other they try to steal the others toys.
-All areas in china they are allowed to smoke cigarettes. The lobby is full of smoke, hallways, even in the elevators. Everywhere you go it smells like smoke.
- we are allowed to pack up to 44 pounds per suitcase. Yikes.
Gotta run.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
3 days with the girls
We have had the girls for just 3 days and we are having a blast. We are learning about each of their likes and dislikes and figuring out their schedules. They have started smiling and laughing and we have found their tickle spots. They are looking at us as if we are becoming familiar to them. They are cooing and doing some baby talk and give us big smiles when we smile at them. We are so blessed to be able to parent twins, we are having so much fun, we are in love with our girls. We thank God that he has blessed us with Nate, Paige and Phoebe.
1. Paige at walmart
2. Phoebe
3. Phoebe at top
4. Paige on left in red jackets
5. Girls with Nate
6. Paige with grandma
Monday, January 10, 2011
Galactic Hotel
possibly what our hotel room will look like. i will let you know when we get there.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Which one is that?
We had a 2 hour flight to Nanchang and a50 min bus ride to hotel. We arrived around 1pm and had to meet for paperwork at 2.
We got the phone call at 3:30 to come down to the lobby to get the girls. Other families were already with their babies when we arrived. Our two were lying on the couch with their caretaker waiting. She handed P Paige first, who he handed to me, then he got Phoebe.
They are much smaller than I expected, maybe fitting into 6-9 mo clothes with room to spare. At times they look identical and other times completely different, P keeps asking me, which one is that? I think phoebe is a bit larger and fussier and seems to be a little more vocal to get what she wants. Paige is more quiet and content and sucks her fingers. Both seem to have a crouppy cough and stuffed up nose.
Prayer needs:
The girls stay healthy and bond with us.
Nate has an easy transition to big brother, yesterday was hard for him.
It warms up a bit, expecting snow tomorrow for our sightseeing day.uggh.
These are a few pictures from my phone of us receiving the girls. I will post more later, we have another busy day of paperwork and buying supplies. Paige is on the left in both.
Love
Kare
Saturday, January 8, 2011
The Forbidden City
We are going to visit TianAnMen Square, Forbidden City and the Great Wall(Juyongguan).
http://www.dpm.org.cn/index1024768.html
A fun day
It was beyond freezing and we froze the entire day but we managed to all last the entire 5 hours or so we had to be outdoors. I can't say enough at how LARGE these structures are and how much walking we did to see them all. Tien an men square can hold 10 million people at once, there is a shrine to Moa and his body is on display since his death in 1976, and little did I know it is right next to the forbidden city.
The forbidden city is an enormous structure, it goes on and on with huge gates separating each section. The architecture is stunning and breathtaking. I could have spent days taking pictures of all the beautiful buildings, ornate ceilings and amazing colors.
The great wall was awesome. We all climbed to the first section of the wall. Nate loved going to the top too! It was climbing straight up, the stairs are very uneven, thank the lord there were hand rails, and it is scary to look down. I don't think that pictures do it justice, it is huge, it is very tall, it is very high and it is a lot of work to climb. Anyway it is late and you wanted pictures so here they are. Big day tomorrow, we leave at 6 am for the airport, get the babies by 4 pm. I will post about that as soon as I can
Kare
Friday, January 7, 2011
Busy Day
Pray for my MIL, Linda, her flight was delayed and she arrives about 4 hours late. She gets in around 6pm.
Drum tower
Olympic stadium
Today we went to HardRock Cafe and had lunch. It was Yummy, it was a beautiful place and we had the place all to ourselves (a little secret is to go for a late lunch and the place is very slow).
Then we took a taxi to the olympic park. Wow, this park is huge! I have a feeling I will be saying that a lot while here in China. We saw the birds nest, water cube, the main causeway, and the torch. It was a bit surreal, seeing it on TV and now being there in person, getting to see the size and colors-- it was all so cool.
It was cold and you will notice we are bundled up and Nate is pretty unhappy having his picture taken. We arrived around 4pm and the sun was setting, it was perfect timing because shortly after we arrived the lights came on in the nest and cube.
Big sightseeing day tomorrow, then on Sunday we meet our girls. Can't believe we are so close to meeting them, it IS really going to happen. This has been an amazing journey.
Tidbit:See that last picture with the funky tower with the IBMlogo, that is a 7 star hotel built for the olympics. I didn't even know hotel star system went that high, apparently there are only two in the world, the other is in dubai. This one has a giant screen that is 4 stories tall in the middle of the building.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Squattie Potty
>
> Yep, encountered my first Squattie potty yesterday. Ladies, I have to tell you, not as bad as I thought. That's all I'm gonna say about that.
> (getting picture from yesterdays sight seeing ready to upload real soon)
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Our view
Jet lag is getting better, last night I crashed really early and we were all up at 2 am. I hope by tomorrow we are on schedule, or we could be sleeping at dinner:-).
The sun came up and was beautiful shining on the buildings. The smog seemed light today, it was cold but clear. Here are a few pics of our view from our room.
Shopping
It was so much fun just looking at all the products in the store. Recognizing the shape and color of items but not able to read the Chinese writing on them. Very popular items had both US and Chinese on them like Tide, Evian, coke and Cadbury. One strange thing was the raw meat was out in bins, people were touching and inspecting pieces then throwing it back in. That would never fly in the US!(pic 3)
Going sightseeing tomorrow, learning to make dumplings, eating our creations for lunch, go to the summer palace, visit a hutong--an old village, then peking duck for dinner. Lots of outside stuff tomorrow, pray we stay warm!
Here are a few pictures of our trip to the store.